Sunday, February 24, 2008

negative chi is eating me up

Sometimes, I think to myself "Did I ever make something right?"
Well, I guess I did. But more often than not, I always.. and
I mean always mess something else in
my life. I make wrong choices that would
lead me to my doomsday.

"Aren't there any normal people left on Earth, or is everybody just back from hell?"
-Spawn


*sigh* Is the world gone wrong? Did I wake up at the wrong side of the bed?
Or is it just me?

Everything's just not right. FamiLy. schooL. other friends. etc.
Shit, I'm so paranoid. Pinoproblema ko lalo
ang mga problema. Hahaha.
Damn! Ipadoktor nio na ako. Pls.?

Crude, I'm weird.

Hahahahaha.

STRESS + PRESSURE + DEPRESSION
+ ANXIETY = MENTAL BREAKDOWN

Monday, February 18, 2008

political mess

"The Philippines has already seen and heard countless lies and fabrication of truth from the government. Seeing politicians talk on national television is like watching a low-budgeted fictional show, everything is obviously fake or phony. It is a torture for me to listen to news on government or politics but I would rather endure listening to these lousy reports than act like I’m not hearing anything."

As a Filipino citizen, I cannot bear carrying the knowledge that the leaders of my homeland brutally steal money from the nation’s budget. It seems that government officials have committed all the imagineable sins to our country. There's graft and corruption, plunder, perjury, betreyal of public trust and others. Man! I thought the government is supposed to help and lead the people to the betterment of their lives. Look at our government now! Sure, the economy is probably getting stronger but are we experiencing the benefits of a developing economy? A Big No No! Life's not getting better in the Philippines. No wonder why some people chose to leave the country not just to work abroad but also to run away from all the bull shits that our government is doing.

Scandals and issues bombard the Arroyo regime every now and then. I must say, GMA managed to surpass every problem that her administration had faced. The most recent controversy that her administration is facing is the ZTE SCANDAL. True enough, the people invovle in this issue denies that they have anything to do with the ZTE SCANDAL. If my memory serves me right, I think this issue began with Joey De Venecia filing a case against Mr. Abalos and then, CHED Sec. Romulo Neri exposed that he was bribed by Mr. Benjamin Abalos in favor of the ZTE Broadband Deal. Senate investigation were done regarding this matter. After such time, the star witness Jun Lozada came out saying that he was held captive by what seem to be the military or could be hired men. He was picked up by these men from the airport. He was not supposed to go to the Senate because he was afraid of the safety of his life and his family's welfare too. Only that, he felt the need to tell the whole truth behind the ZTE scandal as a sign of giving back to the Philippines. Names were dropped, events were narrated by Mr. Lozada. As the Senate hearing progresses, more and more issues were unraveled. Some Senators whole heartedly believe in Mr. Lozada, others tried to destroy his credibility but in the eyes of most filipino's he is a hero. He is one of God's answered prayers for the Filipinos. Majority of the Filipinos put their confidence and trust in Jun Lozada that he will be the key to end corruption in the government. For me, he should not be called a hero rather a courageous man who manage to pull himself together and to tell the truth despite the threat in his life. Yes, he had his own share in the scandal but I admire his willingness to bare everything that he knows behind the controversy. I just hope and pray that he will not be used by the power-hungry politicians who just want to be put into position. And I hope that the Filipinos would not cease to support him. I wish that filipinos will not let the ZTE scandal pass by just like all the issues that disappeared like bubble.

I should be programming right now but instead here I am blogging about jun lozada’s expose. Hahaha. Geez, my nationalistic side is coming out again. Hahaha. Go Lozada. Boo Benjamin Abalos and FG Arroyo. Damn you, GMA! hahahaha. :) Wala na kayong mga dignidad. Hahaha.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Feeling all blue on the day of the reds

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day or Heart's Day..
For couples, it's "their" day. one of the most happiest moments of their relationship.
For some who are currently single (like me), it's nothing but a cold day full of sentiments.
I'm happy being single.. or probably I just got used to the fact that i'm currently single. But still, there are those short times of longing. longing for someone's skin to touch your skin, lips to press against your lips, and soul to embrace your soul. there are those days where i want affection and care. there are moments where I want to know how it feels to love and be loved all at the same time.
And so, while couples celebrate their love for each other, I, on the other hand, watch roses, chocolates, hugs & kisses that keep passing me by.

I am not bitter, well maybe I am. I don't know. It's my fault anyway that I am where I am right now. senseless isn't it? hahaha.

Anyway, Valentine's day is not only for lovers because it is for everyone who knows how to love. It is for every living creature in this planet who's capable of loving.:)

haha.,

Have a Happy Valentine's day everyone!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

if YOU forget ME

If You Forget Me by

Pablo Neruda


I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
"my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine. "

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

excited for me new laptop

yeah baby. my new laptop is coming na. although it's not MAC like the one i had before, i'm still excited for it. haha. 3GB yung RAM e. (2GB tas pina-update kaya naging 3GB). yeyyyy!!!! ^.^

hahaha. next stop, iTOUCH or iPOD TOUCH. haha. *fingers crossed*

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Warrior of the Light

For the Warrior, there is no such thing as an impossible

love.
He is not intimidated by silence, indifference, or

rejection. He knows that behind the mask of ice that people

wear, there beats a heart of fire.


This is why the Warrior takes more risks than other people. He is constantly seeking the love of someone even if that means often having

to hear the word "no", returning home defeated and feeling rejected in body and

soul. A warrior never gives in to fear when he is searching

for what he needs without love, he is nothing.



- excerpts from "Warrior of the Light" by Paulo Coelho

Saturday, February 2, 2008

realization with my course

All this time, the society is continuously imparting in us that computers make our lives better. I had that belief with me ever since I was a child but not until I took the course, ICTM. This course changed my every perception about computers. I have realized that computers make people’s lives easier but not for IT professionals. Hahaha.